On Suffering
In response to kbryna's post and commenters I do not agree with. The post is entitled "crying, notsleeping."
Malpractice? Don't make me ralph.
I think that is a very good question. It asks kbryna to look at the possibility that pathology may rule her life for the rest of her life. It fact, I think it is pretty certain that for as long as she (and, for that matter, all of us) lives she and we are going to be constantly embodied. We are going to be flesh that is both physical and biological; flesh over which we do not have full control.
There are wonderful things to that embodiment upon which kbryna is often remarking. However, it mostly means that we will forever be dealing with suffering of the body and of the mind stuck in the body that, in large part, is driven by pathological emotions anyway.
Indistinct from that, there we are. We are messy, ugly, bags of puss. We are also passionate lovers, inspired thinkers, creative writers, and transcendent singers. Go figure.
I am not a therapist for sure, but I do think about this very thing a lot and I feel it is deeply liberating to confront oneself with the nasty truth: we suffer. A lot. All the time. And it is not going to end until we do something about it because suffering is a condition of the liminal space, the betweeness in which we exist as humans. We are gods and animals all wrapped into one and it sucks, it is confusing, and it is amazing.
The way to end suffering, I think, is to step away from our liminal existence. We will not escape it, but there is something about the leading motion.
We can step deeper into our animal bodies as most choose to do: living in desire, anger, ignorance, and other animalistic pathologies. As animals, we will chase around the food, the fuck, and the kill. We will react constantly to things that excite our attraction and elicit our fear or anger. We will claw our way to the delicious, the lusty, and the shiny. We will bristle with fear and disgust when confronted with the nasty and we will ignite in anger at that which threatens us.
Or, we can step higher into our divine bodies by choosing observation instead of reaction, peace instead of riotous emotion, and compassion instead of fear. In pursuit of spirit, transcendence, the good, or just the better we can find ourselves lighter, happier, freer, or just less afflicted.
The ideals seem lofty and may be unattainable. I am more interested in the direction, because I am drawn in that way. I do not find comfort there. I do find some flavor of peace, though. It is not constant or monolithic, but I not only taste it, I believe in it. The high road is not easy, but it is necessary; necessary if we are going to go anywhere and not self destruct at the hands of a filthy (read: toxic) environment, fragmented psyche, or cannabalistic society. These are all real threats that are flowering broadly in the soil we have spread over the seeds we have planted.
"What if you felt this way for the rest of your life?" (deeply sad, addicted, afflicted, oppressed) You could, you may, and in some way, you will. If it isn't your choice, it is nobody's and, frankly, the choice will simply not be made: the way of the animal.
If it is your choice, then you can do what you will in the place where you are. A choice can be made: the way of the god (read: human).
I love you k.
Malpractice? Don't make me ralph.
I think that is a very good question. It asks kbryna to look at the possibility that pathology may rule her life for the rest of her life. It fact, I think it is pretty certain that for as long as she (and, for that matter, all of us) lives she and we are going to be constantly embodied. We are going to be flesh that is both physical and biological; flesh over which we do not have full control.
There are wonderful things to that embodiment upon which kbryna is often remarking. However, it mostly means that we will forever be dealing with suffering of the body and of the mind stuck in the body that, in large part, is driven by pathological emotions anyway.
Indistinct from that, there we are. We are messy, ugly, bags of puss. We are also passionate lovers, inspired thinkers, creative writers, and transcendent singers. Go figure.
I am not a therapist for sure, but I do think about this very thing a lot and I feel it is deeply liberating to confront oneself with the nasty truth: we suffer. A lot. All the time. And it is not going to end until we do something about it because suffering is a condition of the liminal space, the betweeness in which we exist as humans. We are gods and animals all wrapped into one and it sucks, it is confusing, and it is amazing.
The way to end suffering, I think, is to step away from our liminal existence. We will not escape it, but there is something about the leading motion.
We can step deeper into our animal bodies as most choose to do: living in desire, anger, ignorance, and other animalistic pathologies. As animals, we will chase around the food, the fuck, and the kill. We will react constantly to things that excite our attraction and elicit our fear or anger. We will claw our way to the delicious, the lusty, and the shiny. We will bristle with fear and disgust when confronted with the nasty and we will ignite in anger at that which threatens us.
Or, we can step higher into our divine bodies by choosing observation instead of reaction, peace instead of riotous emotion, and compassion instead of fear. In pursuit of spirit, transcendence, the good, or just the better we can find ourselves lighter, happier, freer, or just less afflicted.
The ideals seem lofty and may be unattainable. I am more interested in the direction, because I am drawn in that way. I do not find comfort there. I do find some flavor of peace, though. It is not constant or monolithic, but I not only taste it, I believe in it. The high road is not easy, but it is necessary; necessary if we are going to go anywhere and not self destruct at the hands of a filthy (read: toxic) environment, fragmented psyche, or cannabalistic society. These are all real threats that are flowering broadly in the soil we have spread over the seeds we have planted.
"What if you felt this way for the rest of your life?" (deeply sad, addicted, afflicted, oppressed) You could, you may, and in some way, you will. If it isn't your choice, it is nobody's and, frankly, the choice will simply not be made: the way of the animal.
If it is your choice, then you can do what you will in the place where you are. A choice can be made: the way of the god (read: human).
I love you k.
posted by Breathing at 11:48 AM
2 Comments:
i love you right back. and i was quite surprised at the comments my post generated; i thought the question asked was quite a (potentially) good thought-exercise.
though knowing your buddhist background (and foreground, i reckon) may have helped me a bit in seeing into your comments differently.
i think "is this as good as it gets?' often and have for years - often in a purely interrogative sense, not as a lament or complaint.
mr. chris -
i'm thinking a lot about the same things, honestly, lately, and will prolly write re: it on my blog... just as soon as i have another drink ;)
my ridiculous book-recommending mindset compels me to point you/whoever toward Chogyam Trungpa's "Transcending Madness," which explains the six bardos in terms of human emotions, and nirvana in terms of getting out of the cycle these negativities cause. not the originally an orthodox view, but whatevs; his interpretation of, eg, hell as a being a crippled bihari beggar is a good route for non reincarnation-oriented folks to explore, and has become pretty standard.
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